Under War Ashes
by horsebugball24
Summary: After the war, Harry and Hermione think over their relationship. Are they really just best friends?  cover image drawn by myself
1. Nightmares

**Chapter 1:**

_**Nightmares**_

**H**arry Potter woke with a start completely covered in sweat. He just had another nightmare. It had been almost two months after the war had ended, and he still had nightmares. It started when he would be standing across from his two best friends in the whole world, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. He would smile, and as he walked over to them, they would disappear, and he would be left alone in the middle of nowhere. A cold voice, that could only belong to Voldemort, laughed, and this always woke Harry up, screaming and soaked.

Ever since Harry was eleven, he had known he was a wizard. Since his parents had been killed by an evil wizard named Lord Voldemort, and he was on his own, except with his horrible relatives, the Dursleys. When he was not at school at Hogwarts Witchcraft and Wizardry, he was with them. Thankfully, he had made friends with Ron and Hermione. They were his rock for the past seven years. But just last year, Harry had to drop out of his safe haven and search for Voldemort's secret to power, his Horcruxes. They were seven peaces of his soul, and the trio went on a quest started by Dumbledore to find and destroy them. The journey eventually brought them to Hogwarts, where the battle officially began. They school was almost completely destroyed in the turmoil. Harry, with the help of many fellow classmates, destroyed the evil Dark Lord, and peace came over the Wizarding World once more.

Now, Hogwarts was completely rebuilt and was back in business once more. One friend of Harry's, Neville Longbottom, became the Herbology professor. Minerva McGonagall was now Headmistress, and all was well.

As for Harry, well he was in a bad state. He was continuing to have nightmares, causing almost no sleep. He was lonely living by himself, and he couldn't find a job. He was a mess.

Harry got up from his sweaty sheets and sighed. He reached over on his dresser and as he put on his glasses, he glanced at his clock.

It was 5:30 AM.

Harry groaned and slowly made his way into the bathroom. When he looked at his reflection in his mirror, he could hardly recognize himself. His eyes were bloodshot, and there were dark purple bruises under them. His jet-black hair was a mess, as always. Harry groaned even louder.

As he made his way down the stairs of his home, he felt lonely again. Sure, living by himself in Grimmauld Place was great, but he had missed his friends. Especially Hermione. She was always there for him. She would talk to him, respond to his rare letters, and was just an amazing woman. Ever since the war had ended, he couldn't stop thinking about his best friend with her bushy brown hair and chocolate brown eyes. When he did think of her, he got a sudden ache in his chest. He missed how she always knew what he was thinking, or what was bothering him. He missed their nights in the Gryffindor common room, when everyone had gone to bed, they would just sit on the floor, looking at the fire. She would sit on his lap, and he would wrap his arms around her, and fall asleep talking.

Harry wasn't the best at romantic relationships, but whenever he was with Hermione, he got a weird, but…exciting feeling he never got with Cho or even Ginny. Not even when he was on his broom.

Harry stood in his kitchen, looking out the window and thinking about everything they had been through together. Fighting Voldemort every year, her being petrified in their second year, going back in time in their third year, finding and destroying the Horcruxes just last year, everything. He remembered when werewolf Lupin had almost attacked them in their third year at Hogwarts. He had forgotten about himself and protected her as she clung onto him. He had always loved her as a friend, and even a sister. But ever since then, he always wondered, and hoped, if there was ever going to be more.

When he told Ron and her he was going to the Forbbiden Forrest to give himself to Voldemort, she had said she would go with him, tears filling in her eyes. He quickly denied, telling her to continue to do her job with Ron. She then took him into the most emotionally charged hug he had ever been in. This was a moment nobody could ever take from either of them, not even Ron. As they held each other, knowing they will never see each other again. It was then that Harry knew that, if was going to tell her, it was know. But he couldn't do that to her. What of she felt the same way? That would make this moment even harder than it should be. And it would tear her apart.

Harry looked up to Ron, giving him direction with his emerald eyes.

'Take care of her, please. You know now.'

Ron understood, and silently, without a word, nodded.

Now that Harry was alive and kicking, with no future threat, he just had to tell her. But he still wasn't sure. He didn't want to set himself up.

'She will never love you like that, Harry,' he told himself.

'Ron and her are happy together, and if she's happy, I'm happy.'

He couldn't seem to convince himself.

With Hermione still on his mind, he grabbed some cereal for breakfast.

Right now, she was living with Ron and the rest of the Weasley's at the Burrow. Harry hadn't visited there often because he tried to avoid Ginny as much as possible, just for awkward moment's sake. Plus, he just couldn't stand seeing his two best friends romantic with each other anymore. At first, he didn't mind it. But realizing what a mistake he made by not telling Hermione sooner, now it just made him, uncomfortable and alone.

Luckily though, Hermione wrote about four times a month, just to keep in touch. Right on cue, his new owl, Jazmin, landed a letter right in Harry's cereal. He chuckled.

"Thanks, Jazzy," he said, as he pet the owl on the head.

She gave him an affectionate nip with her beak.

Last year, when Harry was being transported to the Burrow, a Death Eater killed Hedwig, his first owl. This was hard for Harry because she was one of his first ever friend in the Wizarding World. Harry had missed her greatly, but Jazmin had a special place in Harry's heart.

Harry flipped over the letter and saw that it was from Hermione. He smiled, and when he opened it, he was happy to see Hermione's neat and elegant handwriting.

Dear Harry,

How are you, lately? I am truly sorry I haven't been able to write to you in a while. Trust me when I say that I have missed you terribly. As for me, I have been better. Ron and I have broken up. It just didn't seem right being romantic with each other, but luckily we have remained friends. I am now living in a nice apartment, but it has gotten lonely and depressing at times. We must meet in the near future, for I have something important to discuss with you, and it would be nice to see and catch up with you.

With love,

Hermione

Harry could not believe his luck. He was free tomorrow night, and he knew it would be his chance to finally admit his feelings for her. And now that she wasn't with Ron…

'For Merlin's sake, your both eighteen. Be a man and ask her out! You love her and I bet she loves you back.' Harry yelled at himself. But, still, he tried not to get his hopes up. He didn't want to hurt Ron either. Who knew if he still loved her?

'He understood that look you gave him. He will understand'

Harry sighed and searched for his quill and parchment. When he found it, he sat at the kitchen table and finally, after five different attempts, settled on something to write.

Dear Hermione,

I have been fine, but living by myself has been lonely as well. I am truly sorry about Ron and you, but am glad that we can all remain the same Golden Trio. Meeting up would be great, because I also have something to talk to you about. How about tomorrow night at seven? We can meet at that restaurant in Walnutport. Any questions send me an owl.

Love,

Harry

Harry sealed his letter into an envelope and tied it to Jazmin's claw.

"To Hermione," he directed.

The snowy owl then flew silently out the window. Harry sat back and smiled; ready to see the woman he loved.


	2. Together Again

Chapter 2:

_Together Again_

**I**t was the next day and Hermione Granger read over Harry's letter for the sixth time. She had missed him so much. She hadn't seen him once in almost two months. And ever since the end of the war, she couldn't stop thinking about him. He never came by the Burrow, and he barley wrote, only to respond from her letters. This made it even harder. Sometimes, she would just sit on her bed and sob after Ron had gone to bed. He was not doing well at all, she could tell. But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get anything out of him. She was so worried about him.

She tried remembered all the good times they had. She missed walking around Hogwarts with him, and sitting in the Gryffindor common room, just talking. She missed going on adventures with him and fighting their foes by his side. They were best friends to the end and the more she thought about him, the more she knew that, even though she loved Ron, it just wasn't…enough.

Every time she was with Ron and Harry, she always felt butterflies in her stomach. She used to think this was Ron's doing, but after spending so much time with him, she realized how wrong she really was. She had always loved both of them as brothers.

She thought she had loved Ron romantically because well, she did then. He was a great guy and loved him to death, but they always had something to fight about.

She had gone to Ginny, Ron's younger sister, for some advice when they broke up. She had a relationship with Harry before, but they had broken up not too long ago. She was heartbroken, but understood his reasoning. She knew what to do when it came to break ups.

"Ginny, what do I do?" Hermione had sobbed. "Ron and I just broke up. I have to get out of here, but where? I don't have anywhere to go."

Ginny was holding her and stroking her hair. "I'm sorry about you and Ron. I thought you guys would last a while. Even Harry thought so."

At the mention of Harry's name, something had popped in Hermione's head. It was Harry all along. Not Ron, or Viktor Krum, or Cormac McClaggen. It was always Harry, and it would always be him.

Ginny noticed that when she mentioned Harry's name, Hermione stopped sobbing.

She knew.

And as much as what she was going to say pained her, she knew she had to do it.

She turned Hermione towards her, and looked her in the eye.

"You're in love with him."

It wasn't a question. Hermione sniffled, and nodded.

Ginny's heart sank, but she went on.

"Hermione, go to him. Find an apartment and settle in for a while, but you have to go to him. He needs you, and in more than way than one. He just doesn't know it yet. I know him, and he'll figure it out."

Hermione couldn't believe what she was saying. But that look in her eyes told her it was what she needed to do.

When she thought Voldemort had killed Harry last year, seeing him lifeless in Hagrid's arms, she remembered breaking down on Ron and screaming his name. She also remembered praying. Praying for him to, somehow, come back to them. She remembered thinking how she wouldn't be able to survive without him. Hermione believed that everything happened for a reason. Ron and her broke up and she sent that letter to Harry for a reason. She sent it because she loved Harry Potter. And not just as a friend and brother anymore, but so much more. But how would she tell him?

Hermione sighed as she thought.

"How DO I tell him?" she whispered to herself.

Everything in her mind she came up with sounded wrong. She began to think that, maybe she shouldn't tell him at all. To not mess with their friendship. What they had was great and something she didn't want to mess up.

'No, you have to tell him sooner or later and now is the time. And hey, maybe he'll say it before you.'

She shook the thought off right away and yelled at herself.

"Hermione Granger, you're being absurd. Harry loves you as a friend and sister, nothing more."

But, she couldn't help but hope.

She began to hum her favorite dancing song, O'Children while trying to find something to wear. For the first time, she wished she had a more revealing outfit to wear. She wanted Harry to surprised.

'What would he like?' she asked herself. She remembered seeing Harry gawking at her with red on, or a pair of nice and tight skinny jeans.

'Why don't we just wear both?' she thought to herself evilly.

She was new to the whole seductive thing but, hey, a girl can try.

This was going to be an interesting night.

Harry Apperated to the restaurant and waited anxiously outside. It had taken him a whole 20 minutes to figure out what to wear. After some help from Jazmin, he decided on a red shirt and gold tie with a black dress jacket. He had thrown on his favorite pair of jeans and a pair of nice shoes. He decided on his favorite cologne, the one that always made Hermione shiver.

He was tucking in his shirt when he spotted her. She was wearing tight jeans (which made Harry sweat a little) and a low-cut red shirt. Apparently, she knew how much Harry liked her in red. She had her hair down, and her brown curls embraced her beautiful features perfectly.

'Merlin's Beard, she looks…amazing,' he thought.

His heartbeat kicked up a notch and he started to get extremely nervous.

Hermione looked around for Harry, and when she couldn't find him, she almost started to panic.

"Hermione!" he yelled to get her attention.

She had a look of worry and longing in her eyes, but as she turned her head and saw him, that chocolate color melted and she smiled.

He smiled back, and opened his arms to her. She immediately ran straight into them, almost knocking him over.

"OOF! Well, hello there," Harry said when he caught her. The wind flew right out of him.

"Oh, Harry, I've missed you so much," she gasped into his neck.

"I've missed you too, Hermione," Harry whispered. The tone he said this in was the same tone he used when Hermione was petrified in their second year. He remembered holding her cold, hard hand in his, wishing she was with him to fight whatever was in the Chamber if Secrets.

He continued to hold onto her tight and stroked her hair and they didn't realize how long they were standing like that until Harry felt a tear on his neck.

"Shhhh…'Mione," he said. "It's ok, I'm here. I won't ever leave you like that again. I promise."

Hermione pulled back and smiled when another tear ran down her face.

"Blimey, Hermione. You look beautiful," Harry said as he reached over and wiped the tear off with his thumb.

"Thanks, Harry. And may I say you look very dashing yourself?" laughed Hermione.

"Yeah, considering I needed fashion advice from an owl," he laughed back.

"Now come on," said Harry grabbing her hand. "This place is great, and it's perfect for tonight."

Hermione smiled.

'You have no idea, Harry James Potter,' she thought as the man she has loved since she was 11 escorted her into the restaurant.


	3. Confessions

**Chapter 3:**

_**Confessions**_

**H**arry held open the door for Hermione and led her to the front.

"Reservations for Potter," Harry told the hostess.

She checked the computer screen and grabbed two menus.

"OK, Mr. Potter, follow me."

As they followed her, Hermione reached over and took hold of Harry's now sweaty hand. She had been wanting to do that for a while, and it felt right. Harry looked down at their entwined fingers and took his hand from hers. Hermione frowned, but saw Harry wiping his hand on his jeans and quickly returned it back in Hermione's.

"Sorry about that," he said with a nervous chuckle.

Hermione giggled.

They reached their seats in an empty room with a large window that showed the whole town lit up.

"Here you are," said the hostess. "Your waiter will be with you soon."

"Thank you," said Harry.

"Oh, Harry, it's so beautiful," exclaimed Hermione.

"Not as beautiful as what's right in front of me," Harry said with a look in his eyes Hermione could only define as desire. She turned a violent shade of scarlet, which made Harry laugh. He then quickly became nervous.

"Hermione, sit down. I have to talk to you about something important." Hermione saw the expression on his face.

"What's wrong, Harry? Is the Chosen One actually nervous about something?"

Harry smirked at her then sighed.

"Nothing's wrong. I just wanted to tell you something that's been on my mind since, well forever pretty much."

Harry took one of her hands in his and started into her eyes with a fiery green passion only someone like Harry could muster. This almost knocked the wind out of Hermione. Harry started his speech.

"Ever since we were kids, I have loved you, as a sister and friend. And now I know that…it's so much more than that. I have been …wasting so much time pretending to love Cho or Ginny and looking for the right person when all along, she was with me every step of the journey."

Hermione could not believe this. "Oh, Harry," she began, but she was interrupted.

"Hermione, let me finish before I explode," he said with an anxious smile.

Hermione smiled back and continued to listen.

He took a deep breath and continued.

"Hermione, you where always right there, by Ron and I's side. Even when you thought you were going to die and you wouldn't see your parents ever again. You fought for what you loved and believed in. And that's why I think I'm falling for you. And hard, might I add," Harry said with a chuckle.

Hermione started to well up tears in her eyes, but Harry was not finished.

"What I guess I'm trying to bloody get out here is, Hermione Jean Granger…I love you, as a best friend and so much more. I was wondering if…if you would, finally, be my girlfriend."

As soon as Harry had admitted his feelings, a look of shock filled Hermione's face. He regretted telling her.

'Stupid! You're a stupid git, Harry!' he yelled at himself.

After almost a minute without a response from Hermione, Harry got up and started to apologize.

"I'm sorry. I know if it is too early for you or if you don't feel that way for me. I just needed to get that out, you know off my chest. I'm sorry." Harry lowered his head but soft, caring hands brought it back up.

"Harry, believe it or not, that is exactly the same reason I needed to talk to you. After all we have been through, I realized that it hasn't been Ron I have loved all these years like this. It was you."

She moved a lock of Harry's messy hair out from his eyes.

"I would be honored to be your girlfriend, Harry Potter." A wide smile spread across Harry's face, so much he thought his cheeks would explode.

"Oh, Hermione," he said. Harry pulled her into a tight hug and spinning her around, causing Hermione to laugh.

Just then, the waiter entered the room and cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry to break this…sweet and touching moment up, but I need your food orders," he said rudely.

Harry shot him a look, but sat down after helping his new girlfriend into her seat.

"Well then, I guess I will have a burger with everything on it but onions, and a large Coke."

"Fries with that?" the waiter asked uninterested.

"Sure," responded Harry coolly. He couldn't afford to lose his temper in a Muggle restaurant. Last time he got mad around Muggles, a family member blew up like a balloon and was never seen again. Hary wouldn't know what to tell police if the waitor ended up wit three heads.

The waiter wrote Harry's order down with a scowl then turned to Hermione, who was busy studying Harry intently. The waiter rolled his eyes.

"Excuse me," he said gruffly.

Harry looked at Hermione. "Your turn, 'Mione," he prompted her.

Hermione snapped out of her trance. "Oh, I'll have whatever he is having," she said quickly.

"Sure thing," the waiter grumbled.

But thinking Harry wasn't watching, he took a wide-eyed look at Hermione as he wrote down her order. Harry clenched his fists.

"That would be all, thank you. Now we would like some time alone, please." The waiter gave Harry a look of hate, and then strode off angrily without another word.

"What a jerk," scoffed Hermione.

"He sure is," said Harry as he stared at where the waiter had walked out. "I think I even see a slime trail behind him, see?"

Hermione tried not to spit out the water she was drinking as she laughed. Harry laughed too.

"So," started Harry after their fit, "what has my Hermione been doing lately?"

Hermione frowned.

"Something wring?" Harry asked her.

"Not really. It's just that, well, living in the Burrow was just, oh I don't know, not as I thought it should be. I mean, I love the Weasley's and I do love Ron, but we just didn't share a romantic connection anymore. We always fought and we were never alone. We've decided to go back to brotherly/sisterly love," she said. "Well, how about you, Harry?"

Harry smiled.

"Well, the most exciting thing that has happened is well, nothing," he laughed. "Jazzy and I get lonely often, being by ourselves all the time. And especially since Ginny and I, you know..."

Hermione saw the look of pain cross Harry's face when he mentioned Ginny. Suddenly, a feeling of panic entered the pit of her stomach.

"You still love her, don't you, Harry?"

Harry heard the panic in her voice and quickly reassured her.

"No, I don't. Not like that anyway. I love you Hermione, don't ever doubt that. I just feel so…guilty for just dumping her like that."

"Harry, I've talked to Ginny about this and she understands why you had to do what you did. She's a strong woman, Harry. Don't worry about her."

Harry smiled. "Thanks. I'll be better once I talk to her."

They continued to talk about their time apart until the food came. Luckily, the waiter had nothing to say this time.

"Harry," Hermione started as soon as the waiter was out of earshot. "I have a uh, sort of silly question."

"What?" said Harry as a piece of burger fell out of his mouth. Hermione giggled and Harry laughed. "Sorry 'bout that, but anyway, what's this question of yours?"

"Well, I always thought you loved onions. Why didn't you get them on your burger?"

Harry looked up sheepishly at this question, and Hermione immediately knew why. She started to laugh uncontrollably.

"Harry James Potter, did you not order onions because you didn't want…bad breath?" she managed to choke out between giggles.

Harry laughed with her. "Stupid, isn't it?"

"Not stupid, just silly. And so like you," she laughed out. "Well, I guess I just wanted everything to be perfect and…pleasant," Harry confessed.

Hermione leaned in closer.

"Harry, nothing can be perfect," she whispered. "But that's why I love you and spending time with you. Nothing is perfect, but that is all the fun of the adventure called life, not knowing what's going to happen. And that's what you do being in my life. Now, who would want to be all perfect and boring?"

Harry smiled. "You've got a valid point there. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why you where the brains of the three of us." Hermione raised and eyebrow and shook her head.

"Oh, please."

They both laughed.

After a few minutes, the waiter brought out the check and Harry paid for the dinner. The pair got up and walked out, fingers entwined. As they walked past the main dining area, they saw two very familiar faces. Harry stopped abruptly and squinted at the two people.

"Harry?" Hermione said. "What's the mat..."

"Neville?"

Harry said, cutting her off.

"Luna?"


	4. The Adventure

**Chapter 4:**

_**The Adventure**_

"Harry!" Neville Longbottom and Luna Lovegood ran over to where Harry and Hermione where standing. "I can't believe you two are here!" exclaimed Harry. "What's the occasion?" "Well, isn't obvious, Harry? Neville and I are on a date," Luna said in her matter-of-factly voice. At this Neville put his arm around Luna's waist. Luna turned to him and smiled. Right after the war, Neville had admitted his feeling for Luna. Apparently, she had accepted. "Really? That's great, you guys! Actually, that's why Hermione and I are here." Harry put his arm around Hermione's waist. "Seriously? But, Hermione, I thought you were still with Ron," questioned Neville. "Ron and I broke it off some time ago. I finally realized it was Harry I loved." When she said this, she turned to Harry and looked at him with a twinkle in her eyes. "Well it's about bloody time you two!" exclaimed Neville. "We've all been waiting nearly eight years for you to get together!" They all started to laugh. Then Luna turned to see a waiter carrying two dinners. "Well, Neville, it looks like our food is here. Let's leave the happy couple alone," said Luna. "Oh, no bother at all! Great to see you two!" said Hermione. "You as well! Good luck!" Neville said as he turned with Luna back to their table.

It was about 8:30 when the pair left the restaurant, so they decided to walk to the park that was close by. It was clear, and they stars were shining bright, so they decided to take a nice romantic stroll. "It was so good to see Neville and Luna found happiness after the war," said Hermione. She had both arms wrapped around Harry's waist and her head was resting on his shoulder. Harry had one arm wrapped on Hermione's waist and he was rubbing her arm to keep her warm. "Yeah it was. I know I sure did," Harry said with a smile in his voice. Hermione closed her eyes and sighed, but she then shivered. "It sure is chilly tonight. I should have brought a jacket. Quite stupid of me to not think of it." Harry stopped and pulled off his dress jacket and draped it over Hermione's shoulders. "Better?" Harry asked her. She sighed happily as the warmth of his jacket flooded through her. "Loads." They both smiled at the memory of the quote. Hermione then reached over and pushed a lock of Harry's jet-black out of his eyes. "Just remind me to never give you a haircut again." Harry looked down at her with a serious expression, and put a hand on her cheek. "Never." Harry slowly bent his head down; just to make sure Hermione was ok with what was about to happen. She reached up and took Harry's face in her hands and brought his lips to hers. Just then, something inside both of them snapped. Years of hidden passion and desire finally were let loose as their lips met for the first time. They stood there for a while, locked in their embrace. When they finally broke apart, Harry laid his forehead on Hermione's. The both smiled. "Wow," Harry said, breathless. "I guess Ron did teach you something." Hermione laughed. "What are you talking about? I had that all along." Harry chuckled, and draped his arm over her shoulders as they started to walk along the path again. "Hmm. Starts are bright tonight," whispered Hermione. "Yeah, they are," Harry said looking up. The sky had no clouds, and many constellations were visible without much effort. They both looked up and silently observed the pitch-black night sky. Just then, a shooting star shot across right in front of them. "Look, Hermione!" Harry exclaimed, as he pointed to it. "Wow. That was brilliant." Hermione whispered in awe. "Sure was. Aren't we supposed to make a wish or something now?" asked Harry. Hermione thought, and then turned to Harry. "Yes. Harry, I wish I could be free. Feel the wind in my hair and just not have a single care in the world, like that star. Even if it's just for a little while." Harry thought for a moment, then a wide grin stretched across his face. "Well, Miss. Granger, your wish is about to be granted."

Harry and Hermione Apperated to the middle of a field near Grimmauld Place. "Harry," said Hermione nervously, "What are we doing here?" He then pulled out a blindfold. "I'm granting your wish. Now stop talking and put this on," he directed Hermione. "Harry," she groaned, "you know I hate surprises." "Just trust me," Harry whispered in her ear. Hermione always melted when Harry did that to her. She sighed angrily as she gave in. "All right, but this better be good," she grumbled, as she reluctantly tied the blindfold around her eyes. Harry chuckled. "It is, trust me." Harry pulled Hermione onto his back and started walking. After a few minutes, Harry heard Hermione's squeaky voice come from behind him. "Are we there yet?" she whined. "Stop being so two, Hermione, or I'll turn this wizard right back around," Harry said with a mock annoyance in his voice. Hermione huffed. "I'm just trying to figure out what your up to, pal." Harry snickered. "Don't worry, we're almost there" he assured her. 2 minutes later, they arrived to a part of the field with a high tree line and no Muggle buildings anywhere in sight. Harry plopped Hermione on the ground softly on an area of grass. "Hold on," he said. He brought out his wand and used the summoning charm to call his broomstick. "_Accio Firebolt_," he whispered to his wand. A minute later, his Firebolt came flying over the hill. Harry caught it and placed it in front of Hermione. "Ok, 'Mione, take off the blindfold." Hermione eagerly ripped the blindfold off. She then looked around, and eventually saw the Firebolt lying in front of her. She immediately started to protest. "Harry, you know I don't like flying and I'm terrified of heights. Please don't make me do this." But Harry stood his ground. "Hermione, I wouldn't make you do anything I know you wouldn't love in the end. You're a free spirit. You just said how much you wanted to feel the wind in your hair. This is what I feel on my broom. And if you get scared, I'll be right there with you the whole time. I promise." Hermione started to argue again, but when she saw the truth in Harry's eyes, she sighed in defeat. "Fine," she grumbled. "But if I don't like it…" "You'll love it," Harry interrupted. Harry took her hand and led her over to the broom. "Ok, stand in front of me and grab onto the handle-that's it." Harry placed his arms around her waist and wrapped his hands securely on hers. "Like…like this," he stammered to her. "You need a firm grip at all times," he continued with a red glow on his cheek. "Ok," Hermione said nervously, with the same deep red on her cheeks. "Harry its dark. What are we going to do?" Harry smiled. "Don't worry about that. Seeker's eye sight, remember?" Hermione gulped which made Harry laugh. "Ok, on three," whispered Harry, "push up off the ground with all your might. Ready? One, two, three!" Harry and Hermione then pushed up off the ground hard causing the broom to rise into the air . As they continued to gain speed and height, Hermione turned her head into Harry's shoulder and shut her eyes tight. The last thing she needed was to throw up on her boyfriend. After a minute or two, she felt them get steadier, and heard Harry whisper, "It's ok now, Hermione. Look what you're missing." Her curiosity eventually got to her, and when she opened her eyes, the beauty overwhelmed her. "Oh, Harry," she gasped. Looking over the lake and forest by Harry's house and seeing Jazmin fly by them gave her a sense of freedom. It also gave her a sense of belonging that she never felt before. She knew this was because she was at last with Harry, and she knew this is where she belonged, wrapped in his arms. She also thought how lucky she was to have him. If he would have had been killed last year, she would not have survived. She thought about this and leaned into his chest, wanting to never forget this moment that they shared together. Harry then laid his chin on her shoulder. His breath on her neck sent satisfying chills down her spine, even though he was scolding on her skin. Harry noticed her shiver and became concerned. "What's wrong? Are you cold?" he whispered. "No," Hermione replied. "Just the opposite." She then turned her neck to share a passionate kiss with the man she loved. Harry looked up for a moment, and just in time to spot a giant tree closing in on them. "Watch out!" he yelled as he broke their kiss. They quickly steered the other direction, just missing the giant oak tree that was now shrinking behind them. Looking at each other's expressions, they began to laugh. They had never laughed so hard before in their entire lives.


	5. Staying the Night

**Chapter 5:**

_**Staying the Night**_

**A**fter Harry and Hermione could breathe again, they landed the broom down in Harry's backyard. Just then, thunder echoed as rain started pouring down.

"Crap!" they both exclaimed at the same time.

This made them succumb to another fit of laughs. Harry then reached for Hermione, but she agilely dodged out of the way. She smirked at him.

"Come get me, Mr. Seeker!" she yelled at him.

Harry smiled, and began to run around, chasing her.

"Bloody hell! When did you get so fast?" Harry grunted as he missed her for the sixth time.

After about five minutes of cat and mouse, Hermione slowed down a bit, just enough for Harry.

"Gotcha!" he exclaimed as he finally grabbed Hermione by the waist and held onto her tight.

"I surrender!" she laughed, as she reached up and kissed him on the cheek.

Harry smiled and grabbed onto her hand.

"Come on," he laughed as he led her into the house.

When they got inside, Harry pulled off his soaked coat and shirt, revealing his bare chest.

His chest was sculpted into perfectly shaped tight muscles. He had a moderate amount of chest hair, and he needed a major tan.

Harry became nervous at having himself so revealed in front of Hermione. Sure, it's happened before, but that was…well, before. In his free time, he would lift weights and jog and what not just because he was bored. But he couldn't help but chuckle at Hermione's face.

'Bloody hell, Harry,' thought Hermione. 'When did you become so, so, … gorgeous?'

She tried not to show what she was thinking, but couldn't resist saying something. She had seen Harry shirtless before, but this was…different. He must have worked out. Wow.

"Harry, I really need to take you tanning sometime." 'Stupid! What kind of statement was that?' She kicked herself mentally.

"Ha. Ha." Harry laughed. "You're not the first one to say that. Here," he said as he reached over to her. "Let me take your coat. I'll put it in the dryer."

Hermione handed over her coat. "And maybe a wax too," she said smiling.

Harry cracked her on her bottom with her coat. She pouted then rubbed it. "Ow."

"Funny. I'll be right back," said Harry.

He walked over to his laundry room and placed their clothes in the dryer.

While he was playing with the machine's buttons, he thought about what he should do about Hermione, them being all half-naked and wet and things of that nature.

'Harry, she's been your best friend forever. Don't mess it up,' he told himself. But he was ready to show Hermione how much he really loved her. For so long, Harry had a secret desire for Hermione, but he could never tell her for sake of their friendship and Ron's. But he was ready for this. He wanted Hermione, and now that he had her, he didn't want to let her go again. He sighed as he grabbed a towel for her and began to walk back to the kitchen, still contemplating.

Hermione took the chance of being alone to think tonight out. She was always looking to the rational side of situations, which seemed very annoying right now. She had loved finally becoming Harry's girlfriend and admitting her feelings, but she knew what was going to happen when Harry returned. She wondered to herself if they were truly ready for this.

'He's been your best friend since you were eleven. You don't want to screw this up,' she told herself.

'On the other side, you've been wanting to do this for almost those same nine years.'

She sighed and put her head in her hands.

"I want to do this, I just don't know how," she whispered.

"What's that?" Harry said as he walked back into the kitchen with still no shirt on.

"Oh nothing just…thinking to myself," she told him.

"Oh, ok. Crap, hold on," Harry said as he realized he was still shirtless. "I need to get a new shirt on."

As he turned to go up the stairs, Hermione knew that if she was going to do it, this was her chance. She tried to quickly think of something to say.

"Don't bother!" she blurted out rather quickly.

Harry turned and raised an eyebrow at her.

'Say something else!' she thought again.

"It may be ripped to shreds later, anyway," she said.

'Good. That was good,' she thought.

She started to get comfortable, so she decided to up it up a notch.

She walked over to Harry and shakily pushed him against the wall. Harry chuckled at her, as a giant clap of thunder sounded.

"You might just have to stay the night, Miss Granger," Harry whispered into her neck. "The storm is pretty bad right now."

"Hmmm…" Hermione mumbled as she looked around. "I might just have to take you up on that offer, Mr. Potter."

'Do something!' she thought loudly. 'Kiss him!'

Hermione crushed her lips onto Harry's.

At first, the intensity of the kiss surprised Harry. He quickly got used to it, though, and returned it with all the strength he had.

Harry had no idea how to start this, and apparently neither did Hermione. So, he just decided to do what he thought felt right for both of them. He picked her up, and she wrapped her legs around his waist as he carried her over to the kitchen table and set her down on it without breaking the kiss. He twined his hands into her bushy brown hair. He explored her mouth with his lips, and then traveled down to her neck.

"Hermione," he managed to mumble between kisses.

She had no clue what to do either. She wasn't even sure this is what she wanted. 'Damn myself, always being logical!"

"Harry," she whispered. "Should we be doing this?"

Harry kept kissing her neck. "Why the bloody hell not?"

She then pushed him away. He looked at her with a confused expression on his face.

"Harry, I'm serious! We need to think about what we're about to do!" she told him.

Harry sighed. He was starting to become angry.

"Hermione, I've done enough thinking about this! I've been thinking about it for seven years!" he yelled

Hermione sat there and listened in shock.

"Look, Hermione. I have been your best friend since we were 11. We've been through everything, I mean EVERYTHING, together. But you're right. I now know we can't be friends anymore."

Hermione looked up at him with a feeling of panic. 'No, not this. Please, anything but this.'

Harry continued. "Hermione, we can't be friends anymore because we are so much more than that. Don't you understand? We are soul mates. We belong together. That's why you came into our train compartment that first day looking for Trevor. Fate brought us together. And I know that now. What I'm trying to say is, Hermione I love you and I want you. And I want every single part of you."

Hermione looked up at his eyes. They were burning a hole right through her chest. She could not believe it. She had felt the same way about Harry ever since they were in their third year, but never had the guts to say. She now knew that, whatever was about to happen, they both wanted it to. And the best part was that is was supposed to.

"Oh, Harry, I love you. I always have," she said as she ran over to him.

When she felt Harry's strong arms around her, all she wanted more. She reached up to kiss him, and he met her with gentle kiss. She could then feel him become more eager. They both had waited so long. It was time for this.

She begun to run her hands down his chest and began to unbuckle his belt with unsteady hands.

"Upstairs," she whispered.

"Mmm," Harry mumbled in agreement.

He scooped Hermione up in his arms and continued the kiss as he carried her up the stairs and into his room.

When he got the door open, he placed Hermione on the bed. Hermione got his belt off and pulled his trousers down. He slipped her bra straps off over her shoulders, but then stopped when he felt Hermione trembling.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asked before he continued.

Hermione took his face in her hands. "I'm sure, Harry. Just some first time jitters, I guess."

Harry smiled. "Same here. If you want to stop at anytime just… let me know."

Hermione smiled. "Ok, but don't hold your breath. You might turn purple."

Harry continued kissing her neck with a soft chuckle.

"Just one more thing, though," she whispered.

"What's that, love," he managed to say into her collarbone.

"Shut the door, you twit," she whispered with a smirk in her voice.

"Oh, right," he said as he walked swiftly to the door and closed it.

He made sure to lock it.

The next morning, Hermione woke up to the sun shining through the bedroom window. Harry was still sleeping, and he had his arm around her waist. She looked up at his peaceful sleeping face and smiled.

Merlin, she loved him. And last night showed how much. She knew now that they were connected in a very special way. He was going to be hers forever.

She continued to think as she played with a lock of his jet-black hair. She didn't know how long she was lying there, but eventually, Harry stirred and woke. He immediately smiled as he laid eyes on Hermione.

"Morning, love," he said.

"Good morning, bed head," she laughed.

Harry blushed. "Yeah, that tends to happen a lot."

He had begun to try to tame his hair when Hermione reached over and stopped him.

"Don't," she said. "I love your messy hair. It's one of my favorite qualities of yours, actually."

Harry raised an eyebrow. "Well then, here," he said as he ruffled up his already messy dark hair.

"Better?" Harry asked.

Hermione giggled. "Loads. So, how did you sleep?" she asked.

Harry sat up and stretched. "Pretty good, for the most part. Although, I did keep having this odd dream that this crazy, but beautiful witch seduced me last night. Quite odd," he joked, as he winked at her.

Hermione broke into a fit of giggles.

"Well, I might have to have a talk with this witch," Hermione said with a fake look of anger.

Harry laughed and kissed her on the forehead before he headed into the bathroom and started the shower. He returned with a towel around his waist. "I'm getting in the shower. Care to uh…join me?" he said with a wink. Hermione smiled and walked over to him. "Oh, why the heck not?"

After the shower, they both walked down and Hermione made coffee. Harry sat down at the kitchen table as she brought over a cup.

"Thanks," he said with a smile in his voice.

"Your welcome," she said in return.

After a few minutes of silence, Harry started to shake his leg, which was a habit he did when he was nervous. Hermione noticed and turned curious.

"Harry ," she inquired," is something up? You seem a bit nervous."

Harry sighed and took her hand.

"Hermione, I'm nervous because I been want to ask you something important. Very important, actually."

Harry gulped loudly and continued.

"I know you have been lonely living by yourself and I definitely know I have been. And I know it is early to ask this but, Hermione, I love you and last night showed you how much. I was wondering if… if you wanted to move in with me."

Hermione couldn't believe her ears. Living with Harry, the man she loved, was like a dream of hers. Immediately, knew the answer.

"Oh, Harry, of course I would!" she squealed as she jumped onto his lap.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. "And I love you too, so much," she added.

They sat there for a few moments before Hermione thought of something. She tensed up, and Harry loosened his grip.

"Hermione," he asked, "everything alright, love?"

Hermione stared blankly.

"Harry," she said with a monotone voice. "We have to tell Ron."


	6. Cloudy Forecast

**Chapter 6:**

_**Cloudy Forecast**_

Three months had passed.

Everything was going quite well for Harry and Hermione.

They had all of Hermione's things moved in, and she felt at home at Grimmauld Place for the first time. Harry had done some rebuilding and redecorating, giving the place a cozy and welcoming atmosphere.

Hermione had reversed the spell on her parents some time ago. They knew about Harry and hers relationship, and saying they were ecstatic was an understatement. They planned to visit soon.

The couple was very happy together, barley emerging from their room, seemingly only for food or water.

But one thing was always rotting in the back of their minds.

Ron.

They had sent a letter, explaining what had happened in a nutshell the night after Hermione's "flying lesson". Since that was three months ago with no response from their favorite ginger, this had worried the pair greatly.

"Hermione, this is getting out of hand. I'm worried," Harry said one night as they were sitting in bed. She was reading the updated version of _Hogwarts: A History_ with her desk lamp next to her shining dimly. She had been quite worried about Ron as well, but had a feeling in her gut to let it be for the moment.

"I know, Harry, I'm worried as well," she said as she set the heavy book down and turned off the lamp.

"But for some reason," she said as she snuggled closer to Harry, "I don't think anything bad has happened. He'll write when he's ready. This is hard for him, I'm guessing."

Harry draped a protective arm over Hermione's waist and put his chin on her shoulder as he sighed heavily.

"Your right. But if he doesn't get back in another few days, we're going to investigate."

Hermione turned over and smiled. "All right, deal," she said as she played with a lock of his hair. "But right now, I have something else I want to investigate."

Harry chuckled and pulled her closer, their bodies pressed together.

"And who would I be to stop you?" He said as he kissed her.

As the kiss continued, Hermione pulled the sheets over their heads.

They didn't sleep much.

The next morning, Jazmin tapped on the window quite early, waking them both up.

"'Mione," groaned Harry. The sun was just beginning to shine through the window, and he pulled a pillow over his head. A second later, his snores came quite loudly from underneath.

Hermione sighed, and as she got out of bed on put on her robe, slapped him playfully on the buttocks. This only made him snore louder.

She laughed to herself, and walked over to the window.

"Morning, Jazzy," she said as she lifted up the window. The bird dropped the letter in her palm, and then quickly flew away, out for a hunt.

Hermione then looked down at the letter, and immediately recognized the seal on the back of the envelope, making her heart skip a beat. It was a gold W.

"Harry!" she shrieked loudly.

Harry bolted up and quickly grabbed his wand off his nightstand.

"WHAT? WHAT HAPPENED?" he yelled, pointing his wand in her direction as his eyes searched for a threat.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

"Shut up you idiot and come over here. It's a letter from our favorite ginger." She said as she waved the letter over his nose.

Harry put his wand down. "Ron? He wrote?"

"Yeah. Let's see what his excuse is," said Hermione as she scooted closer to Harry and read the letter aloud.

Dear Harry and Hermione,

I'm really sorry for not writing back faster. Something important has come up that I need to talk to you guys about. I am so excited to see you both again. And it's about bloody time you made a move, Harry. Hermione's been waiting 7 years for you to…well you know. Why don't you guys come on over to the Burrow on Friday? Maybe for some dinner and an extended stay. Bring plenty of clothes!

Sincerely,

Ron

"Well," Harry said scratching his head. "He sounds happy. I wonder what happened."

As Harry said this, Hermione put her hand over her mouth and ran off the bed.

"Excuse me," she said as she headed towards the bathroom.

"Hermione?" said Harry, concerned.

He walked into the bathroom and saw Hermione being violently sick. He knelt down beside her and started rubbing her back while he held her hair out of the way. He waited until she was finished before he asked her what happened.

She moaned. "I don't know. One minute I felt fine and the next, I was praying to the porcelain god. And as quick as it came, it's gone. It's been happening these past couple of mornings, Harry. Maybe something I ate?"

Harry pushed some of her brown hair behind her ears and out of her face. "Well, why don't you brush your teeth and we'll figure out what's up, ok?"

He kissed her sweaty forehead. She nodded and walked into the bathroom.

Hermione was sitting in the bathroom. She was late, and almost by a week. She hadn't been this late ever before, if ever. She decided after her episode this morning that it was time to find out for sure. She was nervous, wondering what people would think of her. Especially her parents. But at the same time, she didn't care. She knew what had happened between her and Harry was no mistake and that they both wanted it to happen. And the best part, it was a product of her and Harry's love and she knew he would be there the whole way with her. She smiled, and then sighed as she looked down at the pregnancy test with her trembling hands.

Harry was starting to become anxious. Hermione hadn't come out of the bathroom for almost ten minutes. He walked over to the door and knocked quietly.

"Hermione," he called, " are you alright, love?"

Hermione then flung the door open with such force that it startled Harry. She had the pregnancy test in her right hand as she smiled.

'Jeez,' he thought. 'Something must have happened in the bathroom that was important…oh no, what's that in her hand?' Harry's heart skipped a beat.

"Hermione, can I ask what that is in your hand?"

Hermione smiled. 'Here it goes,' she thought nervously.

"Harry, I'm pregnant."

Harry's eyebrows raised and his mouth hung open. He couldn't find anything to say.

Hermione started to get worried as Harry just stood there not saying anything. "Harry?" she asked, concerned.

"You're preg...preg," he stammered. He swallowed the lump in his throat. "Pregnant? Like, baby pregnant?"

"Well, duh!" she exclaimed as she ran over to Harry. He took her into a hug, but still in his trance. She had to be joking. Pregnant?

"Oh Harry, this is great!" Hermione exclaimed as they stood there in their embrace.

"Yeah, it's uh…wonderful," Harry said quietly.

Hermione noticed his tone and looked at him. This wasn't like him, and she expected a bigger reaction.

"Harry, aren't you happy about this?" she said with worry spread across her face.

Harry didn't know what to say. Of course he was happy. He loved Hermione and he did want to start a family eventually. But for Merlin's sake, they were 18! They had just started dating and…truth be told, he was scared. Scared he wouldn't be able to live a fun life with Hermione now. Scared what people would say about them. And most of all, scared he couldn't take care of a girlfriend and a baby. He didn't have a job yet and couldn't depend on his parents' money forever. He wanted to be a good father sooner or later, but now was not the time.

"Hermione, of course I'm happy. It's just that, well, there goes our twenties," he said with a sigh.

Hermione backed up and looked at him. Did Harry really just say that?

"Harry, how could you say something like that?" The impact of his words hit her hard, and she could start to feel tears well up in her eyelids.

"I just think we are way too young to be parents. I mean, we just started dating a few months ago, and we aren't married. What will people think of us? And we won't have a chance to…experience each other with a kid to take care of! We should have been a lot more careful," he retaliated as he ran a hand through his hair.

The tears in Hermione's eyes finally won as they started flowing down her cheeks. What Harry was saying was shattering her heart.

"You told me this is what you wanted. And I believed you!" she yelled at him. She was angry now.

"I did! I mean, I do! I want you Hermione. I just don't want this!" Harry yelled back. But as soon as he said it, he regretted it. He reached for her to apologize, but she shrugged out of his reach.

"Don't you dare touch me," she said as she glared at him.

"Hermione please, I'm sorry…" he started, but she cut him off mid-sentence. He turned away from her as she spoke.

"Don't worry. I get it now. If you don't want this baby, then maybe Ron will."

What she said took Harry a few moments to realize what she meant. She was going to leave. The anger in him quickly faded away as he realized he could lose her to Ron again. He quickly spun around.

"Hermione, don't!" he yelled as he reached for her. But it was too late. With a crack, she had Apperated.

She was gone.

Harry raised his arms in frustration. "No!" he growled as he kicked the nightstand. When he did, Hermione's copy of _Hogwarts: A History_ flew across the room and hit the wall. Harry heard the thump and went over and grabbed it. He sighed as he sat down on the bed, holding the large book in his hand. He opened it up to where Hermione had her bookmark. The bookmark was a picture from an old camera. It was a picture taken of them at a carnival. A few weeks ago, Harry saw an ad for a carnival and took Hermione for the night. He had won her a pink puppy in the Ring Toss and bought an ice cream for them to share. In the picture Hermione was holding the puppy and Harry was putting ice cream on her nose. They both were laughing, and they looked as thought nothing could ever touch them. A man had come up to them moments later with the picture and handed it to them. He was an artist, and when he saw the scene it inspired him for a future painting, so he took pictures. It was a day they both would never forget.

As Harry looked at the picture, he felt his chest tighten. He kissed the picture and began sobbing into the book.

"Hermione, what did I do?" he cried.

He sat there for a while, until the phone rang.

Ronald Weasley was never a smoker, but it was just a habit he picked up a few weeks ago. It calmed his nerves when nothing else could, and that's what he needed at the moment. With a cigarette in one hand and Harry and Hermione's letter in the other, he looked up at the early morning clouds that were floating above him. He wished he could be a cloud. Floating around, doing nothing in particular. That's what his life sort of felt like at the moment.

He had lost Hermione out of his own stupidity, and even though he was pissed at that, he knew it just didn't feel right kissing her. Almost like, he was kissing his best friend.

'Oh, yeah,' he thought.

But even though a cloud may just float, it has its place.

They had broken up one night, and while Hermione left, he had stalked off to a bar just to let off some steam.

He sat down and ordered something called a martini, and quite liked it. Very similar to firewhiskey.

But as he took a sip, he looked to his left. A woman with long black hair and clear blue eyes took his attention. She looked over at him, and he felt a click. Something he never felt before.

He smiled, and she smiled back. Merlin, she was gorgeous.

They started talking, and Ron figured out she was a previous Hogwarts student named Daniella Hawthorne. She was in Ravenclaw, and had just graduated and was looking for someone to settle down with.

'Odd place to find a single witch, but I'll take it,' Ron thought.

They talked. Got to know each other and now, Ron was no longer a single cloud.

And as he sat on his porch looking over the letter, he knew how right all of this seemed.

He felt guilty about writing back so late, but they would get over it eventually. He missed them and couldn't wait until Friday. But that thought barley left his brain when he heard a loud 'CRACK' of disapperating.

Ron took out his wand and walked over to the direction of the sound. "Hello?" he said.

"Ron?" he heard a familiar voice squeak.

It was Hermione. Her eyes were red from crying and she was only in a morning robe. Ron was thoroughly confused.

"Uh, Hermione, would you mind telling me why you are here, at," he looked at his watch, " 7:30 in the morning, and in a morning robe? Where's Harry?"

When he mentioned Harry, she ran over to him and took him in a hug as she sobbed. Ron let her cry, but was still lost.

Then, Hermione let Ron go and pulled back. Ron thought she was going to be smiling, but a look of extreme pain crossed her face as she yelped. She grabbed onto her abdomen.

Ron immediately panicked and tried to hold her up off the ground. "Herms, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

He could see the look of fear cross her face as she mumbled something barley coherent.

"The baby."

It was shock first. Then possibly anger. No, more shock that Ron felt. 'Pull it together, she's in pain.'

"Right, uh, what baby?" he asked her as gently as he could manage.

Hermione winced again, but tried to quickly explain. "Harry and I…told him I was pregnant…had fight…" She screamed again, and Ron didn't know what to do.

"Ron, please… St. Mungo's and Harry…quick, the baby," she panted.

"Right hospital. Ok, sit here, and I'll go cal Harry. I'll send Ginny out and she'll take you to St. Mungo's. Hold on, Herms. You'll both be ok." He kissed her on the forehead and ran inside.

"GINNY!" he yelled up the stairs as he ran in. Eventually, Ginny slowly waltzed down the stairs, looking like she had just woken up.

"What, Ron?" she yawned.

"Hermione is on the porch in pain. Please hurry out there and take her to St. Mungo's. She'll explain." Ron said as he grabbed the telephone and dialed he hopefully thought was Harry's.

Ginny looked at him in shock.

"Go, now!" he yelled at her with the phone in his hand.

She snapped out of her trance and ran outside.

Ron danced impatiently with the phone in his hand, "Come on, answer you git," he mumbled.

Finally, he heard a familiar, but quiet voice from the other end. "Hello?"

"Harry?" Ron said rushed.

"Ron?" Wha…"

"Harry, listen. It's Hermione."


	7. I Promise You

**A/N:**** Wow. It's been a REALLY long time since I've updated. I'm SO sorry about this, but I do have valid excuses!**

**1. I got a concussion. Yeah, no fun**

**2. School, marching band, and softball started. It's been crazy.**

**3. I have homework every night. Dang teachers don't respect fan fiction needs.**

**And I didn't want to write anything I would regret by not having 100% of my head into it. So during break, I sat down and wrote. Maybe I will have more chapters up this week. Again, I apologize, but thank everyone for reading. R&R as always, and enjoy!**

Harry's POV

Anger: A strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.

Fear: An unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is in danger, likely to cause pain, or a threat.

Shock: A sudden feeling of disturbed surprise from a certain event.

Love: An intense feeling of deep affection.

It was tough to know which emotion to feel right now. No, not just one. A combination.

Anger. At myself for, Merlin, more than one reason. For being the biggest git I know. For ruining the best thing that happened to my life. And for hurting the one person I could put my trust in, and who returned it. The one person I gave all my love to and didn't throw it back in my face. The one woman who loved me for who I am. Me. Myself. Harry James Potter. Not the bloody Chosen One.

Fear. Well, for obvious reasons, and definitely the most intense fear I have ever felt in my life. Fear for her well-being. Fear she was in pain. Fear I would lose her again. Fear that she was still angry. And fear for losing my only chance for a family.

Shock. Shock that, the first friggin' time we both were EVER intimate, we got pregnant. I should've known that's how it works, but I guess was distracted at the moment. Shock that, even after I blew up like that, and I have and intense desire for a family and life with her, that I know we are not ready for this. Sure, I would love it and take care of it and whatever fathers do, but I know it would always deserve a better upbringing than love-struck teenagers.

And love. Love love love. Love for her. Love for her body, her curves, he smile, her beautiful, chocolate eyes, her bushy hair, everything. Love for her intelligence, how she can read a book -thicker than Crabbe and Goyle put together-in less than a few hours, and how she's so logical. Sometimes that comes quite in handy. And I think most importantly, love for her as a person. Just how she can make me feel like the most wanted, desired, and amazing man even when half the world doesn't know I exist. The way with one look, just, god, the most beautiful look I will ever receive just melts through me like a hot knife through butter.

And she feels the same way. Or, at least, she used too.

And I know as this is running through my head as I'm running through St. Mungo's hospital franticly with hot tears stinging my eyes, that I have an obsession. The healthiest obsession possible. Obsession with her being mine. With her being safe and happy. With her loving me. With me loving her with everything in my heart. With loving Hermione Jean Granger. And I will never give up.

Back to 3rd Person

Ron was pacing, as Ginny was talking to the healer. They both were worried sick. Hermione had explained everything that had happened since the night at dinner to her fight with Harry. She shed tears, some hot and angry, but mostly regret and longing. Even only being away from Harry for an hour made her antsy and, almost depressed.

But many tears that Hermione did not show to her best friends were of sadness. Everything was ruined. She thought that this baby was the best thing that had happened for a long time, except for being with Harry. She was never a selfish person, but she thought to herself as she sobbed, didn't she deserve this? After everything she had been through? The healer came into her room, with a sad look on her face, Ron and Ginny behind. She began talking, but Hermione knew what she was going to say. She nodded blankly, Ginny hugged her, Ron kissed her on her forehead, but eventually, they let her rest. They sat outside the waiting room, talking and after finding out the news, cried.

But all Hermione could pay attention to was if he would come back to her. If she had make a mistake leaving him. The anger from the fight before was gone, replaced with remorse. Remorse for the fight, the latest news, and for possibly leaving and never seeing the best thing that had happened to her again.

Panic also set in. Panic that Harry would never come back to her. She couldn't bear to lose him. Not again, after thinking he was dead numerous times. So much panic that, the healer had to come in and sedate her. The drugs made her drowsy, and she eventually fell asleep.

Harry ran across the corner minutes later, sighting the red-head family he loved. He ran to Ron.

"Harry! What took you so long?" Ron said, relieved he was finally here.

"I had to get my head together. How is she? Can I see her? What happened?" Harry said quickly.

"Slow down mate, she's alright. She's asleep right now. But she Apperated to the Burrow crying. I was confused, but she screamed in pain and said something about the baby. Ginny took her here while I called you."

"Can I see her? I need to see her." Harry said, his voice rising.

"In a minute. The healer is in there. She just sedated her for a few minutes to calm her down. She had a pretty bad panic attack."

"Panic attack?" Harry said, now more worried.

"Yeah, she kept saying 'I need him, I need him,' over and over. She got frantic, so the healer put her to sleep," Ron said trying to calm Harry.

The healer then walked out and smiled weakly at Harry. "Are you the boyfriend?" he asked calmly.

Any other day, being called Hermione's boyfriend would have made him smile like an idiot, but not today. Harry didn't think his muscles were capable.

"Yes. How is she?" Harry said.

The healer put a hand on Harry's shoulder. "She is fine. She panicked, I'm guessing about you by what she was saying, and I just gave her some drugs to put her to sleep for a time. She should be awake soon, since it's a very mild drug."

Harry sighed in relief. "She's okay. Can I see her?"

The healer than sighed and his face grew grim. "Yes, you may. But son, I'm sorry to say, she had a miscarriage."

Harry stopped breathing for a second.

Miscarriage.

He wasn't a genius at pregnancy business, but he knew that word.

"Shit." Harry said as he ran his hand through his hair. "What caused it?"

" Well, I ran a few tests, and the symptoms she had appeared right after she Apperated. I've never had this happen before, but the Apperation seemed to have caused it. I'm sorry, lad." The doctor said.

A tear formed in Harry's eye and he sighed shakily, trying to keep it together.

"I'm terribly sorry, lad. But you're young. I can tell you both love each other very much. It'll happen when it's meant to. For now, I want her here overnight to monitor, but she will be released tomorrow. Again, I'm sorry." He pat Harry on the back, sent a weak smile to the Wesley's, and left them alone.

Harry wiped the tear away. He tried to move, but his limbs were frozen. He closed his eyes, sighed and said, "It's all my fault."

All at once, the whole Weasley family tried to protest, but Harry held up his hand. "Don't try to convince me it isn't, because I know you're all thinking it."

Ron reached out and squeezed Harry's shoulder. "It's no time to be guilty mate. She needs you. She wants you. She isn't angry. She just wants comfort, Harry. Give it to her."

Harry swallowed, nodded, and walking into Hermione's room. He closed the door behind him softly, and took the chair in the corner and moved it next to her bed. Her sleeping cheeks were red and puffy from crying, and a she had a worried crease on her forehead. Harry reached across and smoothed it out with his thumb. Then he wiped a tear away, and caressed her cheek. He smiled and a tear rolled down his cheek as she subconsciously smiled, and then sighed in content,

"Oh, Hermione," he sighed. "This is my fault."

He kissed her forehead, and then rested his forehead on top of hers. He sat there as hot tears rolled down his cheek and he listened to her heartbeat.

A half and hour passed until Hermione stirred. Harry looked at her and kept his hand on her face.

"Hermione, love? Can you hear me?"

Hermione blinked, and she saw the most beautiful face in the world to her at the moment. "Harry?" she said in disbelief. "You're here? I thought… I didn't think you would ever…"

"Shhhh..." Harry silenced her as he took her face in both his hands. "It's okay. I'm here. I wouldn't leave you."

"Oh, Harry," she cried as she put her head in his chest. "I'm so sorry. For getting angry, for everything."

Harry hugged her tight. "Don't be sorry. I was being an arse. I mean I acted like it was all your fault when I could have handled it better. Then I caused, well, this," he said as he shook his head.

Sadness crossed Hermione's face again. "You found out?"

"Yeah, the healer told me. Hermione, I cannot tell you how sorry I am. I got you angry enough to Apperate that cause it."

Hermione looked at him. "Harry, it isn't your fault. I didn't have to storm out like that. I was being stupid, illogical. Even though it was only a few hours, I began to love that baby. A product of our love. A piece of you and me. But now I realize that, what you said makes sense. We're young. We have a whole life to live. I was raised a Christian woman, so I believe this was what God planned for us. We're not ready, Harry. Not yet."

Harry looked up. "You really feel that way?"

Hermione nodded. "Yes. Maybe someday, but not yet."

Harry smiled, but became serious as he took both of Hermione's hands in his. "Hermione Granger, I'm going to make you a promise."

She smiled. "Go on…"

"I'm going to promise that, if you still want to, we will try. Maybe someday we will be married, and older, and happy."

Hermione smiled at the thought of becoming Harry's wife.

"I promise that, once we decide it's time, we will have a family. Deal?"

Hermione smiled and kissed him. "Deal."


End file.
